Thursday, March 28, 2013

Haunted for life…..


If you think this blog is about a ghost then you are wrong! It occurred to me last night that we say/do so many things during our life, knowingly & unknowingly, that makes us regret for the rest of lives. These deeds or words of ours, although not literally meant, do not permit us to undo thereby scaring us till eternity.
I am sure many of you must have experienced this but I particularly remember this since I miss my dad a lot and there are some things that I said which I cannot undo and I wish to god I had not been so awful.  Our parents bear the brunt the most and so do our siblings.

I am sure many of you in a fit of anger tell the standard dialogue to your parents when they scold you for not having dinner when you decided to eat out with your friends without intimating at home -  ‘I never asked you to cook they why do the favour’. When you don’t meet their expectations and they remind you of how they have always fulfilled your demands/needs, you must have responded ‘Big deal that’s your job, that’s what parents are meant for or do’. When your parents bring you something and you say ‘Geez I didn’t want this you could have brought me the other one (or) who asked you to buy when you don’t know my choice. When you are on your mobile doing work or watching TV and your parent wants to speak with you, you lash out and say ‘God why don’t I have my privacy, will you be please let me be or leave me alone please’. In such instances, if you get a chance to say sorry in your lifetime it may be as a memory you will cherish since you got an opportunity to undo the wrong doing.

However, imagine when you are terribly busy making your career and your dad says ‘there is a nice place there we need to go there for coffee’ and you reply ‘not now latter’ and the next you know your dad has passed away and that ‘latter’ will never come, you can never forgive yourself. These words will haunt you for life. You will repent throughout your living days for not having spent that quality time with your father. There are many such instances I know off when people have said ‘I wish I never had a dad’ and next they know, god has answered their prayers! In such instances, the haunting with remain throughout your life till you take it to your grave.

Source: Google Images

They say beware of the tongue since it is boneless and has not limit to the harm it can cause. But if you train your tongue with your heart you could reduce the damage. The only thing that can save you from this torture is apologising. There is no better feeling than going back to the person who you have hurt and saying ‘sorry for what you said’ or ‘have done’ and meaning it from your heart.  Am sure you can do this much to save yourself from being haunted by your own deeds for life!

Sunday, March 10, 2013

Lonely in a crowd......

Humans are social animals...this is what they say. In layman terms then humans would constantly need people to be around them. But if you think seriously, there may be many instances in your life where you would prefer to get your corner seat at a resturant or a place in the garden, not seen to others, and just love to sit there alone. Have you every wondered that why the bathroom is the favourite place in many people's life? Its because this is where you get absolute solitude...i.e. MY TIME!
Am I different?

In my lifetime I have experienced that situations like these are usually crated by various factors, your attitude towards life, your work, your family or simply you. If you are primarily a reserved person, you will feel lonely even in a party since you think networking is not required or its simply trying to be a wannabe. If you have had a rough day at work, then a simple question like 'how was your day' by you mom could tick you off. So to avoid any clashes you prefer to abstain from any conversation..result you prefer being alone even when you are with your family. If you have prying relatives constantly interested in whats happening in your life, why are you not married, do you have a boyfriend or simply prefer to irritate you then you are alone even in a roomful of relatives. I am sure there are many such instances you could relate to but the question is this the right thing to do. 

Have observed that this is a common experience when you join a new place. You remain a stranger in your surroundings from quite sometime and that really kills you sometimes. Worst are the scenarios when you loath in inferiority complex. Sometimes you simply feel small for whatever reasons it - could be your beauty, your physique  your financial status your dressing sense anything. If you are fed-up of being lonely you could turn out to be a good submissive. So the big question is 'Is it better to cut off or wear a mask and put on your happy face and act normal?'

I did speak to a couple of friends about this and to my surprise all of them agreed that it is very important to have the 'MY TIME' to get some perspective. Wearing a mask depends on the requirement of the situation but may not always help. The 'MY TIME' helps you evaluate the emotions you are going through and answers some of your darkest questions. This however is applicable for grown-ups. With kids its a reason to worry since they are so full of confusion that often leaving them on their own could be dangerous. If you have  experienced such moments in your life it would be worthwhile if you could share. Your experience on how you dealt with it could help people overcome their apprehensions and maybe not feel LONELY in a CROWD!